Does anyone care to hear some of my ‘Random (sic) Lockdown Observations’? (Well, I’m sharing them anyway)

This is a direct nod to Barry Ritholz, one of my everyday go-tos for his Daily/Weekend Reads (The Big Picture). Though they are mainly and ostensibly about business and finance, there are very often some fascinating links to a wide range of articles about much else besides. I’m still ‘in between’ ideas for posts – I’ve got 3-4 bubbling away on the backburner – so for now, I thought I would share a few of my own random observations.

Except that I have to be really pedantic and pernickety to start off with – these are anything but ‘random’. Arbitrary, perhaps, but more like inchoate. Or half-baked. But I’ve put at least some thought into them, and they are things that have been floating about in my head for the past week or two (or three or…)

Here’s his full list: Ritholz’s Random Lockdown Observations

I’ll quote just two of my favourites, one to get the ball rolling.

‘There are two kinds of people during this lockdown: Those who are having a bit of fun with it, and those with kids. No joke, every parent I know has real challenges that those of us without kids at home do not.’

All I will say is this: I imagine this quarantine stuff would be a piece of cake if I could just while away all my free time reading, catching up on films and not worrying about my little girl setting the cat on fire, smearing jam on the sofa and running around with knives.

In between work, naturally.

I’m not here to offer predictions and prognostications, I’m just trying to make sense of stuff on a daily basis. Reminder: I read way too much news. It’s conflicting, overwhelming but I can’t help it.

So a lot has been said about the future of restaurants and dining. There are people with so much more to worry about than whether they’ll be able to dine out again. Like the actual establishments themselves – will they survive? And in what form? I miss eating out, and café-going, and hitting the bars and whatnot. I can’t imagine what this will look like in the future.

Here’s an expert’s take on the potential future of the restaurant industry. This is a great read:

The Dumbing Down of the American Restaurant (The Atlantic)

If you’re a foodie, you’ll enjoy Ugly Delicious (Netflix), which features the chef Dave Chang going round the world looking at food, everything from pizza to tacos to crawfish to BBQ to fried chicken and so much more. It’s inspiring and full of mouth-watering treats. You watch a show like this and you think ‘to hell with it’: when it comes to food, live life to the maximum. It’s hard watching this and not being able to eat all of these exquisite delights.

I like Domino’s. I like Starbucks.

I just felt like sharing that. I wonder if people are being contrarian when they say they hate places like Domino’s and Starbucks, or whether they truly dislike them. I’m sure it’s a bit of both, and there is certainly nothing wrong with disliking either of these places, for whatever reason. I’m just thinking out loud here. I like them both. I think a lot of people feel like they have to dislike these places. Or that it’s wrong or just not cool to admit liking them.

I’m a contrarian in many ways, no doubt about it. Many of us probably are, to some extent.

But I’d also like to think I have discerning taste in food.

The best thing I’ve watched on Netflix:

Our minds get up to all sorts of crazy thoughts while locked down like this, but I was ruminating on travel the other day. Here we go again, but what does the future hold? I have no idea. I just feel awful for my poor parents who don’t know when they’ll get to see their cute little granddaughter again, and my poor sister who doesn’t know when she’ll get to see her little niece again, even if she pretends to like her and not-so-secretly despises any non-furry creatures under the age of 18.

And then selfishly…May is often the month for our trip to Western Ukraine, to the Carpathians, breathing in the fresh, pristine alpine air and partaking in delectable, scrumptious cuisine (never tried Western Ukraine cuisine? Massively underrated, in my opinion). How I long to get to the great outdoors, far from a city, with a chance to soothe my achy muscles and unwind.

For a trip down memory lane, there’s this post from 7 years ago:

Where time stands still, free from technology: a reflection on the Carpathians 

Speaking of which, too much sitting, too much computer work, too little exercise. The second of Ritholz’s quotes I want to share:

‘Speaking of Zoom meetings: The secret to a good Zoom meeting is 30 minutes or less. If I were on 8 hours of Zooms a day — and some poor bastards I know are — the mental health challenges would go off the scale.’

Well, thankfully my ‘meetings’, per se, are limited, but there are a few Zoom-heavy days to get through, not to mention other necessary computer ‘work’. And yes, there is such a thing as Zoom fatigue.

Why constant video chats are so exhausting (BBC)

Sorry, but I can’t resist: another old man, technophobe, Luddite alert: hell, it’s a battle getting through a day without some internet/wi-fi/technical glitch fiasco. The anxiety of not knowing what to expect is killing me, and worse, it’s self-perpetuating. Even after a good experience, I’m still left wondering ‘alright, but the next time?’ I feel like I’m slowly being dinosaured out.

Students reading this: add that to your phrasal verb list: to be dinosaured out. It now exists, as far as I’m concerned.

Most days is just a matter of survival.

In a meeting the other day – I hate to do this, but I will – I heard this about a new ‘thing’ we’re using: ‘you don’t have to use it, but you can use it…’

And I thought ‘phew…’

And then I heard: ‘if you have the time and energy and want to explore…’

And my next thought was ‘ha!’

I just want to get through every goddam day in one piece. I’m not asking for much.

(I’m trying to be deliberately vague here.)

Back to the contrarian thing?

Travel thoughts/mini-rant: Again, this lockdown does shit to our brains. Thinking of a travel-related post the other day, but realising I didn’t [yet] have the time and inclination to pursue it any further, in my head I played around with a ditty entitled:

‘Barcelona is overrated, I never want to go to Paris and Venice stinks – metaphorically and literally’

And I truly believe these things. Not many of us are – or should be – travelling, and my stir-craziness has reached a fever pitch level, so I started thinking of how to be as contrarian and provocative as possible and try to piss a few people off. Why? Why not, I suppose. Not that I wanted to intentionally irritate people, but I wanted to write about a few things that I well and truly believe.

I may revisit this idea, especially if there’s any interest and/or demand and/or mild curiosity.

I did mention that this was an ‘inchoate’ post, right?

I’ve reached the stage of my life where, when I think about my ‘dream trip’ of the moment, it’s something like a slow, epic rail journey throughout parts of less touristy Europe (the Norwegian fjords, picturesque German villages off the beaten path, northern Poland) and the UK, exploring the distant reaches of the British Isles and Ireland. Going as far north in Scotland as possible. Doing a whisky distillery tour. Every nook and cranny in Wales. Cornwall. The Peak District. The Cotswolds. Planning very little and hopping on trains and seeing where I end up. Exploring more of Ireland. Seeing some of my dear relatives in Northern Ireland who I haven’t seen since 2006.

In other words, I’m definitely a misanthropic recluse, no doubt about it. Though many of my loyal readers have never doubted this.

The ‘1^st world even though I’m living in the 2^nd world’ section

1 There are pluses to working from home. Many would say that not having to commute is one of them. But my commute is usually the best time – or in my case, the only time – that I can or want to listen to podcasts. I just can’t listen to podcasts at home. I’ve tried and just can’t. So with 2+ months of no commuting, and more to come, my podcast backlog is utterly ridiculous and growing daily. Will I ever get through them?

2 Three times now I’ve been thwarted in my attempts to buy asparagus from my local supermarket. I don’t live in the most salubrious part of Kyiv, and I wonder how many locals would splurge on the asparagus, so maybe that’s part of it. But every time I try to buy it, for whatever reason it won’t scan at the checkout and the cashier tells me something undecipherable under her mask and shield, but which loosely translates as ‘what the hell do you want this overpriced asparagus for, you daft foreigner? Buy some carrots instead!’. Even without the mask and shield, my listening skills are shaky. At least that’s what I think they’re telling me.

Either way, I can’t seem to get my asparagus. (editor’s note: just before going to press, the author was successfully able to procure some asparagus)

3 I only have enough gin left for one or two dry martinis. And I can’t buy anymore.

Well, technically I can, but I won’t.

I should have taken a ‘before’ picture of my liquor cabinet for a ‘before and after’ contrast at the start of this lockdown. It was pretty impressive then. It’s dwindled to less impressive now. And because I love making absurd promises or challenges to myself, I said that I would refrain from buying any more liquor at all – beer and wine excepted – until we move into our new flat. We bought a flat, but it requires everything to be put into place (it’s basically a ‘shell’ now), and we were dragging our feet a bit on it at the start of this year, only for this blasted virus to come and wreck our plans and put things on hold. But just to force us to act, and to give me some motivation to get our asses into gear, I decided that I would only start re-stocking my bar once we get to our new flat. There’s no telling how long that will be.

In the meantime, I’ve had to get pretty creative mixing cocktails.

[end of section ‘1^st world problems’]

Parting thought…or rather, ‘farting’ thought?

For those of us who have been using Zoom or various other online meeting platforms. Have you noticed that if you’ve muted yourself but then make a noise or say something, you get a message pop up that says something to the effect of ‘you’re muted, if you want to say something, unmute yourself’?

During a meeting the other day, I was in a bit of discomfort with some serious wind. I had to let rip with a cacophonous chorus every couple of minutes. And every time I did, that message popped up.  

As my Granny would have said, ‘I think I’m going doolally’.

Or it could be the 3-4 hours of sleep I’ve been getting a night.

I blame the lockdown.