The World Cup Culinary Challenge: an update
It’s the first rest day of this World Cup, and I’m not sure how I’ll cope. I’m already suffering from severe withdrawal symptoms – well, it’s either that or the potent Long Island Ice Tea I had to soothe my nerves during the USA-Germany match last night. I haven’t quite managed to fulfill my goal of watching every minute of every match, but I have come pretty damn close (though it’s amazing how many goals I miss when I turn my head to do something, or get a cup of coffee or am distracted by my cat doing something cute – I swear, she has caused me to miss exactly four goals, and I’m absolutely positive she does this on purpose.
Anyway, what better way to ease my
pangs on an off-day than to offer a recap of my World Culinary Cup challenge?
If you missed my last post and want the full run-down, as well as a long,
meandering maudlin look at my World Cup memories of the past, have a look here.
Otherwise, a brief reminder of what
this little food and drink odyssey is all about. Here were the original general
rules: for every day of the World Cup, we would choose one of the teams playing
and make a dish, have a drink or go to a restaurant serving something that was
a staple of that country. Simple, right? In theory, yes, but to make it more
challenging, we couldn’t repeat the same country, which meant a bit of
prediction would be involved to think about which teams might get eliminated
and which would advance to the next round.
A simple idea and Olya was excited, I
think. Part of this was to get her more interested in the World Cup. (I’m not
sure it’s worked, but I’m still trying)
How have we fared so far? A mixed bag,
but I think we’re passing…just. The rules required a little bending and
tweaking, and if I were to put this to an independent judiciary panel for
arbitration on the rules of the World Culinary Cup, they might find a few holes
and disqualify us. We’ve had to rely on luck – both good and bad, and I’ve had
to shoe-horn one or two things to make them fit.
Here’s the rundown thus far. (kickoffs are
Ukraine time)
Day 1, Thursday, 12 June: Brazil v
Croatia, 11pm
Only two teams playing, but only one way
to get the ball rolling, something from both countries: Grilled calamari from
Croatia and caipirinhas, of course. What else?
Day 2, Friday the 13th:
Mexico v Cameroon, 7pm; Spain v Holland, 10pm; Chile v Australia, 1am
Our first roadblock. The plan was
Mexico, with margaritas and tacos. But I didn’t finish work until 9.30, and by
that time the Mexico match would be over. It seemed a bit anti-climactic to eat
Mexican food after they had played. We took a massive gamble and opted for
Spain: crianza, jamon de serrano and a bit of sheep cheese. It was a high-risk,
high-reward move – on first thought, we were losing Spain so early on. But when
they got pummelled 5-1, it looked like a good move. In hindsight, now that
Spain are out it was brilliant, and there was our first stroke of luck.
(pre-tournament, I actually predicted Spain and Chile to make it out of their
group, not Holland; you see why I don’t bother making ‘official’ predictions
anymore?)
Day 3, Saturday, 14 June: Colombia v
Greece, 7pm; Uruguay v Costa Rica, 10pm; England v Italy, 1am; Ivory Coast v
Japan, 4am
The only day with four matches meant
more choice, but also more to deliberate over. Figuring Greece was a good
candidate to not advance, we had Greek breakfast burritos. Seriously, there was
no cheating involved here, I looked up a recipe and there it was. I’ve wanted
to make moussaka for a while, but finding lamb can be difficult in Kyiv.
I should also point out, in the
interests of transparency, that there were a few matches that I didn’t watch
live – Ivory Coast v Japan, for example. I’ve miraculously managed to avoid
lots of results and happily watched matches repeated the next morning.
Day 4, Sunday, 15 June: Switzerland v
Ecuador, 7pm; France v Honduras, 10pm; Argentina v Bosnia, 1am
Here we were on a Sunday, with ample
time to prepare something a bit more lavish. I went with chaulafan de pollo, or
Ecuadorian fried rice. It’s far more elaborate than it sounds, and done
properly, it takes a fairly long time. I must say, it was delicious, and I made
enough to last us a couple of extra days. Olya was impressed. I should have
taken a picture, but here’s where I found the recipe:
(and for my money, the goal of the
tournament so far is Seferovic’s to win it for Switzerland against Ecuador right
at the death – the consummate team goal; I can’t quite understand how this isn’t
making any of the ‘top 5 goals of the tournament so far’ lists, but have a look
at it and keep in mind that it all happens in the dying seconds of the match;
in terms of importance, it’s easily number 1)
Day 5, Monday, 16 June: Germany v
Portugal, 7pm; Iran v Nigeria, 10pm; Ghana v USA, 1am
Monday is my lightest day at work, and
I knew the rest of the week – my last before my summer holiday started – would
be hellishly busy and difficult, and time to cook would be at a minimum. It was
my last chance for a few days to prepare something exotic and complicated. I
decided on Nigerian Egusi soup. I knew I wouldn’t be able to find the pounded
yam (or cassava) that goes with it, but the rest of the ingredients seemed easy
to enough.
The hardest part was the Egusi seed.
However, many recipes say you can use pumpkin seed. This is the most crucial
ingredient: you can’t make Egusi/Pumpkin soup without the damn pumpkin. I swear
I’d seen pumpkin seeds before, but I searched high and low around Kyiv, got
endlessly frustrated, and had to rush back so as not to miss the kickoff of the
early match. Mission failed. I instead found a variation of a spicy beef
recipe, with some nice Mama Africa’s Zulu Sauces brand habanero sauce (with a
10/10 spice rating on the bottle). Was this a sign or what? I just happened to
see this stuff for the first time at our local supermarket. Bad luck quickly
turned to good.
Day 6, Tuesday, 17 June: Belgium v
Algeria, 7pm; Brazil v Mexico, 10pm; Russia v South Korea, 1pm
Our first asterisk of the tournament,
but I think it’s totally valid. I got home late, Olya had made deruny, or
Ukrainian potato pancakes. We were boycotting Russia and instead had Ukrainian
food. Yes, that counts.
Day 7, Wednesday, 18 June: Holland v
Australia, 7pm; Spain v Chile, 10pm; Croatia v Cameroon, 1am
Things were looking dicey here. I went
to O’Connor’s, an Irish pub, after work with a couple colleagues. I had a
bottle of Chilean wine in the fridge for Chile, but what to have at the pub?
Again, there’s going to be another asterisk here, but I ended up getting a
chicken burger with fries…for Australia. I was with Brian, an Australian, and
he assured me that you can get chicken burgers all over the place in Australia.
There was no Australian wine on the menu (or kangaroo), and I wanted to save
the Chilean. Yes, that counts.
(although it did feel a bit hollow
since we had missed the Australia match and were watching Spain v Chile, but we
can’t have it all, right?)
Day 8, Thursday, 19 June: Colombia v
Ivory Coast, 7pm; England v Uruguay, 10pm; Greece v Japan, 1am
It was back to O’Connor’s, this time
with a big group of colleagues, and it was fish and chips for me. And another
painful England loss and with it, elimination from the World Cup (confirmed for
certain the next day when Costa Rica beat Italy).
England was going home, but I had had my
fish and chips.
Day 9, Friday, 20 June: Costa Rica v
Italy, 7pm; Switzerland v France, 10pm; Ecuador v Honduras, 1am
It was such a busy day for me that I
barely had any time to think about anything, let alone cook something. Olya was
the superstar here. I got home around 10 to find a scrumptious French meat
croquette dish with a mint and pea puree side. It was absolument délicieux. And
then France walloped Switzerland 5-2. Quelle nuit!
Day 10, Saturday 21 June: Iran v
Argentina, 7pm; Germany v Ghana, 10pm; Bosnia v Nigeria, 1am
Our first exotic meal outside the home,
at Persian Palace, where we watched Iran v Argentina. Though it was fairly
quiet, there was a group of Iranians anxiously cheering on their boys, who were
of course heartbroken when Messi scored in injury time to deny them a
well-deserved point. We were upset too. Though I’m far from an expert on
Persian cuisine, I thought it was an excellent meal. Though I’d forgotten what
we had, a quick visit to the Persian Palace website reminds me:
* Loghme: mutton kebab
* Ghorme Sabzy: mutton, beans and
verdure (again, this is right from the website)
* Persia salad, naturally
* Grilled lamb chops, which I can’t
find on the menu (maybe ‘Sultany’)
* Shafran rice with barberries
* a bottle of room-temperature
Ukrainian white wine
Besides the wine and the unfortunate
result, it was a splendid meal.
Very conveniently, a chemist is located downstairs
Sod’s law in action
Afterwards, it was to a local
bar/restaurant, Pivna Duma, or ‘Beer Parliament’, for Ghana v Germany.
Now, we can see into both the
restaurant and the kitchen from our flat. It’s not a bad place with half-decent
sausages and their own brewed beer. But I have a serious problem with the place
– (1st world problem alert!) whenever there’s a big match on, we can
hear cheering a good 4-5 seconds before it actually happens on our TV. They
clearly get their satellite feed faster than ours, despite watching it on the
same channel (can someone explain how this happens?). Big matches, especially
when Ukraine play, are a bit frustrating, and closing all the windows, turning
the volume up, nothing works. It hasn’t been too bad this World Cup (the anti-Russian
cheers are the loudest with Ukraine not in it), but we figured if we can’t beat
‘em, join ‘em. So we watched Ghana v Germany there. At 10pm on a Saturday
night.
And the place was lifeless, totally
devoid of any atmosphere. One of the best matches of the World Cup, and there
were merely a handful of people in there, most not paying any attention.
There hasn’t been too much atmosphere
anywhere for this Cup. Unless I’m going to all the wrong places, there’s been
all the atmosphere of a funeral parlour for most matches. For Uruguay v
England, there were 10 of us watching at O’Connors at 10pm on a Thursday, and
that was it. The rest of the place was empty. Spain v Chile the night before,
there were three of us. When Chile scored their first goal, a waitress dropped
a glass and it smashed on the floor. It was an accident. That was the
atmosphere.
Day 11, Sunday, 22 June: Belgium v
Russia, 7pm; Algeria v South Korea, 10pm, Portugal v USA, 1am
This might have been the luckiest day
of all. We’d planned on mussels, frites and ale for Belgium. I’d got up in the
morning, without even thinking of what I was doing – let’s just call it
unconscious World Cup fever - and made something akin to shakshuka, poached
eggs in a sauce of tomatoes, cumin, peppers, onions, other spices, usually
served in a heavy pan. I’d first tried this in Haifa, when in Israel for my pal
Yonni’s wedding in 2008 (along with Dr Wasabi Islam, Jeff and some other bozo
who won’t get mentioned because he won’t read my blog, the swine!)
I made it, we enjoyed it, and then
thought about what to make for dinner – to go with Belgium, or onto America for
burgers or buffalo wings? Then I realised – isn’t shakshuka Algerian? It’s like
with a lot of these Middle Eastern dishes (sorry for a bit of lazy
generalisation), hummus for example. Every nation of the region claims it’s
part of their national cuisine, and that they created it. Well, it doesn’t take
any stretching of the imagination whatsoever for this one. Shakshuka is firmly
established as an Algerian staple, according to multiple sources. Without even
realising it, we’d had an Algerian breakfast. And that night, they went on to
thump South Korea 4-2 (one of those classic games that pre-tournament, on
paper, looks like a bore but turns out to be thrilling; Tunisia v Saudi Arabia
in 2006 was much the same, a riveting 2-2 encounter).
Day 12, Monday, 23 June: Holland v
Chile & Spain v Australia, 7pm; Croatia v Mexico & Brazil v Cameroon,
11pm
Onto the final round of group stage
matches, which meant simultaneous kick-off times. So, one match on the big
screen, the other streaming on the computer.
It was finally time for Mexican night –
I was glad we’d saved it. So far, thankfully, we hadn’t been drinking too much at
all. But now it was time for margaritas and enchiladas (chicken and prawn) with
beans and spicy corn on the side. Unfortunately, I had a splitting headache and
wasn’t in a particularly good mood. After making two fairly potent margaritas,
I decided I just didn’t want to drink, so poor Olya got pretty tipsy (not that
she complained too much about it, except when she had to get up early the next
morning). The enchiladas were great, though far from authentic.
Day 13, Tuesday, 24 June: Costa Rica v
England & Uruguay v Italy, 7pm; Greece v Ivory Coast & Colombia v
Japan, 11pm
A bit of a tricky, somewhat agonising
decision had to be made today. England were already out, so that match had an
anti-climactic feel. Italy was in some danger of going out, but I thought
they’d get the draw they’d need to make it to the next round. Japan it was then
– their chances were slim, and I didn’t want to lose an easy opportunity to
have some sushi. Except that I had more time on my hands, it officially being
the first day of my summer holiday. So we went with salmon teriyaki, udon
noodles and a spicy cucumber sesame salad.
That was the later kickoff, so my eyes
were on Italy v Uruguay, hoping and praying Italy would go through. Now,
despite my Italian heritage, I’ve never been a fan of the Italian football
team. On the contrary, I usually want them to lose. Today, I wanted them to get
at least a draw, ensuring their survival for another day. Kyiv has a chain of
restaurants called Mafia, one of these ubiquitous places where one can get both
sushi and pizza (along with a range of other mediocre Italian dishes) 24 hours
a day. It’s not a bad place, but it is the place where people tend to go in the
early hours, when they’re drunk, nothing else is open, and they’re desperate
for karaoke. They actually have a nice, cheap breakfast special that I get
every now and again.
They also advertise a free half-litre
of white wine when you order their special one-metre pizza. You can also get a
free pint of Stella Artois with their sushi roll special. These ads are all
over the place, on the metro, around town. I’ve wanted to go for ages, but any
time we see the ad or mention it, Olya just rolls her eyes and says no. The
pizza there is, to be fair, pretty lousy. But that’s not the point – I’m a
sucker for special offers – hell, if it were free cold urine I’d be excited - and
I wanted that pizza with the free half litre of wine! And Olya finally relented
and said we’d go, for Italy, if they got through.
(a free half-litre of cold urine to go
with your pizza? Yes!)
That made me nervous, and the match
took on added significance. Just to hedge my bets – and calm my nerves – I made
myself a dirty Limoncello martini (vodka, vermouth, limoncello, olives). I
clutched my Mafia discount card in my hand for luck. I said a few rosaries, a
couple of hail marys, uttered plenty of mamma mias and shouted way too many
vaffanculos. We all know what happened in this match: Suarez bit yet another
opponent and poor old Italia went the way of Espana and England and said
arrivederci.
No Mafia for me, but thank goodness for
that martini.
Day 14, Wednesday, 25 June: Bosnia v
Iran & Nigeria v Argentina, 7pm; Ecuador v France & Switzerland v
Honduras, 11pm
Today was going to be a problem. We’d
had more than enough meat and cheese lately (the enchiladas were particularly
cheesy), so Bosnia was out, because I had planned on going to a local Turkish
shop and getting kebabs, which are quite similar to the kebabs I ate when
visiting Bosnia a few summers ago with Dr Wasabi Islam. Argentina as well,
because it will have to be some type of steak for them. Swiss cheese would have
been an easy one, but that seemed like cheating, it was too simple. But Olya
was also going to be at an event till late and she was eating there, so I
didn’t feel like cooking anything too time-consuming for myself. So, I went for
lunch to Tres Francais, a delightful little French restaurant in Maidan, and
sat outside on the terrace overlooking the square. Okay, so I’d already had
French, but this time I had something from their special Breton menu. Again,
another asterisk might have to go here. I’m counting it.
Day 15, Thursday, 26 June: Portugal v
Ghana & USA v Germany, 7pm; Belgium v South Korea and Algeria v Russia,
11pm
I was pretty nervous for the USA match,
so I started off with that robust Long Island Ice Tea. Portugal was just about
out of the tournament, so they would have been a safe bet, and I could have
saved Belgium and the USA for round 2. But I just couldn’t be bothered with
anything Portuguese, I’m not sure why, and it was a 2 for 1 special: USA and
Belgium. I had a small buffalo wing snack, and then a buffalo chicken salad,
along with mussels and frites. Having two national dishes for the same meal
will surely appease the World Culinary Cup gods and they’ll no doubt forgive
the previous day’s French repeat.
But now that Belgium play the USA in
round 2 next Tuesday, we might have been better off saving this one. I’ve still
got plenty of Belgian ale.
The cat likes to supervise to make sure I'm making my drinks properly. 'Too much tequila in that Long Island Ice Tea, you idiot! More triple sec, fool!'
What’s on tap for the round of 16?
Menus and plans have yet to be
finalised, but here’s what we’re looking at:
Day 16, Saturday, 28 June: Brazil v
Chile, 7pm & Uruguay v Colombia, 11pm
Surely this has to be some sort of
South American meat feast with charcuterie, churrasco, asado, whatever, with the
Chilean wine to go with it. Bring on the steaks! Just a pity Argentina isn’t
playing today as well.
Day 17, Sunday, 29 June: Mexico v
Holland, 7pm & Costa Rica v Greece, 11pm
Well, I suppose it will have to be
Holland, unless I can think of a Costa Rican dish. Herring then? Washed down
with more margaritas? Come to think of it, what would be more appropriate than
hash and marijuana for that first match? (if any family or relatives are
reading this, I’m just kidding!)
Day 18, Monday, 30 June: France v Nigeria,
7pm & Germany v Algeria, 11pm
I’ve said all along that for Germany
it’ll have to be schnitzel. I don’t care if it’s technically Austrian, when I
lived in Germany I used to love pork schnitzel. And besides, there’s a
restaurant called Schnitzel Haus I’ve wanted to try for ages now. And I came
across a pork schnitzel recipe the other day (not that it’s very difficult
mind, but surely it’s a sign?).
But with that early match, I could try
to track down pumpkin seeds again, or even have a 3rd French meal –
we haven’t had any French wine yet either. Or something more southern French,
like cassoulet, which being soup-casserole like has similarities to Nigerian Egusi
soup. This is a potentially easy, fun day on tap.
Day 19, Tuesday, 1 July: Argentina v Switzerland,
7pm & USA v Belgium, 11pm
Well, a bit of Argentine wine and Swiss
cheese as a starter, then some grilled gaucho steak with chimichurri, another
recipe I’ve recently come across. But I also found a great Martha
Stewart-inspired southern fried chicken recipe. If the USA get past Belgium,
I’ll make that for the quarterfinals.
In the meantime, smachnoho.
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